Paris Accord and the USA: Amazing Rocket Ship’s blistering response

The Paris Accord was heralded by Amazing Rocket Ship way back in December 2015 [see here]. Now President Trump has put his foot in it, as is his way, and says he is an isolationist when it comes to matters of economics/the actual future of our planet. Therefore, two Amazing Rocket Ships have taken it upon themselves to put the USA into isolation – literally – through sending the entire country [with the exception of California and NY] into a geostationary orbit above the planet Earth where it and its president can do no further harm and reflect on their stupidity. If the USA won’t comply with global emissions then let the USA do its dirty deeds in the vacuum of space. Here on Planet Earth Amazing Rocket Ship seeks to ‘make space for everyone’.

USA is lifted out of the World map

The United States of America is literally removed from the world map by two Amazing Rocket Ships after Trump’s climate change folly.

ARS seeks to put the USA in space

Two Amazing Rocket Ships land on the USA, insert grappling hooks, before taking the entire country into geostationary orbit.

Fake White House: dastardly plan by Amazing Rocket Ship

With President Trump out of the country for a few days, Amazing Rocket Ship and a stealth team from the Rocket Ship Foundation have been busy. A fake White House has been assembled [out of cardboard for lightness] and set up in a secret location.

ARS and Fake WHite House

Donald Trump arrives home in Washington and is deceived by the fake White House

The plan is as follows: President Trump and entourage arrive home full of themselves; a convoy of pretend limos takes the great and the good to the Fake White House; whereupon Donald, besides himself with pumped up pride at what he has done as a global statesman, enters the portico [ignorant to the fact this is not his usual residence], and into the bowels of Amazing Rocket Ship, cunningly waiting. The rest is simple – a flick of a switch and the Trump is blown into orbit and everyone gets back to doing what they were doing in early 2016.

Donald’s 100th day in office doesn’t go quite as planned: thanks to Amazing Rocket Ship

Enough is enough, say we here at the Rocket Ship Foundation. Hence, we came up with a dastardly plan to make sure the President had something truly memorable on his 100th day in the Oval Office. Unbeknown to the Secret Service, Amazing Rocket Ship was able to gain access to the Presidential wardrobe (owing to some highly dubious back channelling through diplomatic circles) and those famous red ties.

Donald Trump and the 100th day doesn't go quite as planned

Donald finds an infiltrator in his wardrobe: his tie explodes and Amazing Rocket Ship takes his head into geo-stationary orbit

Amazing Rocket Ship, concealed as a red tie, then exploded at an opportune moment, sending Donald’s head into geo-stationery orbit and thus averting World War III.

North Korean missile crisis: Amazing Rocket Ship in diplomatic geo-political shuttle mission

Just back from talks with the North Korean administration [see here], Amazing Rocket Ship headed straight for Washington where US President Donald Trump was told: ‘This ain’t show business, Donald. It’s time for you to behave.’

ARS and Trump in crisis talks

Donald Trump is brought a message by Amazing Rocket Ship

Trump protest rally: Amazing Rocket Ship adds weight

The inauguration of Donald Trump has ignited waves of protest around the world, and the Rocket Ship Foundation lost no time in sending a signal to the new administration that it is not going to sit back and play dumb. Amazing Rocket Ship was therefore despatched post haste to add weight and influence to the impassioned Voice of Reason, as shown in this news photo.

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Trump inauguration protest joined by Amazing Rocket Ship

[Note: The Rocket Ship Foundation distances itself entirely from falsehoods that may be put out by the Trump Administration regarding a meeting held in November 2016 between the then President-elect and Amazing Rocket Ship. See here. Yes, a meeting was held, a frank meeting, at which Amazing Rocket Ship sought to sound out Mr Trump on his views on space exploration. Mr Trump replied, ‘Space…there money in Space? Maybe I can rebrand the Moon as LunaTrump and put an Hotel up there. What’d you think Amazing Rocket Ship?’ At which point Amazing Rocket Ship left the meeting, citing a headache.]

Exclusive: Trump-elect anoints Marlboro Man as designate under-secretary of Health

Following Amazing Rocket Ship’s recent meeting with Trump-elect [see here}, a back-channel was established that has now borne fruit – Marlboro Man himself is being resurrected to serve in the new Administration to promote good health. And why not? After all when first formed Marlboro Man was indeed the personification of an ideal – women loved him (as they seem to love Trump-elect) and with the crush-proof packaging, well, that speaks for itself. As the ad says: ‘This one you’ll like’. A lot to like!

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Marlboro Man is nominated in the new Trump Administration

Amazing Rocket Ship meets President-elect Donald Trump at Trump Tower: Exclusive

Amazing Rocket Ship today met with President-elect Donald Trump at the latter’s temporary HQ, Trump Tower. Amid the gaudy setting Amazing Rocket Ship was robust in conversation with the President-elect, who had personally made a call to the Rocket Ship Foundation to offer a three minute audience.

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President-elect Donald Trump meets with Amazing Rocket Ship at Trump Tower

The Rocket Ship Foundation, which has been steadfast in its opposition to a Trump Presidency, later issued this communique:

To all supporters of Amazing Rocket Ship and worldwide friends. It was carefully debated whether or not to accept this invitation from the President-elect. However, given the democratic process and the need for orderly transition of power it was agreed it is prudent to sit with an incoming dictator (oops)/President-elect than to snub. Access is everything in real-politik. Amazing Rocket Ship acknowledges there have been deep and often irreconcilable divisions between Mr Trump and the ethos of this Foundation – namely Making Space for Everyone – yet is prepared to offer the Olive Branch of Reconciliation.  It is hoped this [short] meeting will have enabled Mr Big Ears [oops] Trump to assess the regard in which Amazing Rocket Ship is held among the worldwide community, and to recognise the importance of fraternity and reconciliation in the years ahead. The Rocket Ship Foundation pledges to work for All and adhere to its founding mantra: Powered by Make-Believe.